Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Long time, no post.....

Where have I been - right here, just waiting..... waiting for that blow up moment, but it just hasn't happened. It is really wierd and I don't know what to think!

Mom called me one Saturday morning. Just to chat, etc. She was sober. She was talking about AA meetings and what she was doing to keep herself busy.

A week later, she called again. Again, she was sober and just wanted to chat. And she actually called me out for not calling Grandma (that is a whole different story and it meant she was in contact with her) I decided to invite her to church with us. She was so excited and said YES. Sunday am came and I called to make sure she was still coming. G answered and said she was sleeping and wouldn't be going. Figures.

I was upset for a day and then thought, whatever. Thursday, she calls me. I ignored it and she left a message that she was sorry she missed us Sunday. Oh and she had a question about counted cross stitch. That really pissed me off. The only reason she called was b/c she had a question and then "oh yeah, I better apologize."

Then she called again on Saturday. Again, she was sober. She apologized sincerely for missing church and wanted to know if she could go this week. She says her meds are all screwed up and she is sleepy alot. She again mentioned her meetings and was talking about making amends with people. (Don't know when she plans on making amends with me and my family.....)

She ended up going with us and had a wonderful time. She visited with the boys in the backseat on the car ride and it was nice. So, last Friday I called to see if she wanted to go again. G answers and says "Well, i am not supposed to tell you but she is at rehab again." He tells me how much she enjoyed our visit and that she is just not right. He thinks her meds are interacting and doesn't know how to help. It was really odd the way he talked about it. Almost like he was making it up, then again I am not sure. I asked if it was court-mandated, he said no. I almost wonder if she is at a mental hospital rather than a rehab. I think she has issues that she doesn't discuss with us girls - I am sure the crack and other drugs have not helped her mental state. Maybe she will call soon. Until then, I am taking One day at a time because I just don't know what to think.

1 comment:

Fractalmom said...

one day at a time is about the best you can do.

you are keeping her exposure to your children minimal, and only letting them see her when she is okay.

other than that, you are not letting her choices impact your life.

I wish you didn't have to deal with all this, but you do.

My prayers are with you and your sister.